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The Amazing One-Woman Show: Spotlighting Small, Woman-Owned Businesses

 

 

Come one come all and see The Amazing One Woman Show. This mind-bending spectacle features products from small, women-owned businesses. You will be shocked by the displays of pure genius and creativity put on by our resident Freaks, with otherworldly abilities performed with grace. However, the true freaks of nature are not the performers but the women who run these small businesses, juggling the everyday stresses of life with all the different roles of a business, shapeshifting between CEO, Creative Director, Social Media Manager, Seamstress, Merchandiser, Customer Service Representative and so much more. Adorned from head to toe in only the finest, hand-crafted masterpieces from featured small brands, our Freaks are not for your consumption...but their products are.

The Ringmaster

Follow your ringmaster down the rabbit hole - your enchanting hostess whose wardrobe is a show in and of itself. You can always find the Greatest Show Woman at the center of the action, wearing a little feathered tophat from LilBirds Couture, an Etsy shop of tiny tophats galore. Her dress, which appears to have been taken straight from the Victorian-era, was handmade by Sheana Hinesley, the unstoppable force behind Malicious Designs, a virtual wonderland of fairytale dresses made to order. Your ringmaster will guide you through a land of thrills and horrors unknown, with a sparkling Kinky Peach chain flogger in hand to help "explore your wildest fantasies"...and punish those who misbehave. With a Hex Girl mask to stay socially distant from those beneath her, onlookers will never know the full extent of her beauty. Any creep who tries to get a peek of her Creepyyeha Fentai Garter Belt, made-to-order by Yeha Leung, will surely have the scars to prove it. Stay back!

 

The Witcheries of the Ethereal and Her Lovely Lady Dove

Our first act is The Witcheries of the Ethereal and Her Lovely Lady Dove. Unlike male magicians who rely on the help of their female assistants, this sorceress needs only the power of her feminine energy to perform feats of wonder. Pay close attention, but try not get hypnotized by her Checkered Lolita Set from Ozcult, a brand whose dreamy pieces serve as  “an exploration of the Divine Feminine.” You won’t believe your eyes as she pulls a dove out of an empty hat. Look quick! For the Lovely Lady Dove will soon disappear into the same thin air from which she was pulled. If you’re lucky you will catch a glimpse of her intricacies, like her pearly Chanel brows from Cholas x Chulas, a pioneer Latinx beauty brand that will dazzle you with their unique collection of body adornments. An emblem of female complexity, the lady dove in flight embodies all that is beautiful and free, a sort of chaotic good. Her duality can be seen in her Chaotic Good Set, soft and white like the feathers on her wings, while her talons hint towards chaos. Just one swipe and she can slit your throat with her sterling-silver plated talons made by the talented Lisa Tedeschini of MyrilJewels. But how is this incredible trick performed? A magician never reveals her secret.

 

The Human Ragdoll

Next up is our contortionist act: the Human Ragdoll. Out from the chest of horrors where she resides, the Human Ragdoll may appear lifeless but she is very much alive; she is a doll but not an object. A master contortionist, she might appear jointless with her arms or legs bent unnaturally at the hinges. She was stitched together with the finest of ribbons, and her Stitch Socks from Depop-mogul Internet Girl are detailed with bows and lacy trim. Her necklace, another piece from the ever-innovative iGirl, is inscribed Please Return to Heaven, although she’s surely a creature from hell. Still, on the surface she appears innocent in her Taffy babydoll dress from Malicious Designs. But looks can be deceiving. Possessed with a demonic spirit, she dons a Chaotic Evil Set to represent her true alignment to the underworld.

 

Psycho The Killer Clown

You can run but you can’t hide from the knife-wielding monster of your nightmares, Psycho the Killer Clown. This terrifying Harlequin somehow manages to be spooky and stylish at the same time in her jewel-encrusted Killer Clown Ski Mask made in collaboration with Badluck Workshop, a brand boasting the brilliant designs of Jasmine Chavez. Her Freak necklace is a relic of the now-deceased angelxfreak which has since been resurrected as Genesis Exclusives, a shop “curated by & for Angels.” Loose on the town in a Harley Quinn Crop Top, watch out for this psycho killer.

 

The World’s Handcuff Queen and Prison Breaker

The Master Mystifier presents her own original invention: the greatest sensational mystery attempted in this or any other age! Watch as the handcuffed and shackled woman breaks free from a water-filled torture chamber in under 15 seconds, all the while looking classic in a black signature set. Starting in an upside down position, you almost can’t even see it happen as she makes her way flawlessly out of the death trap. Like every woman, people throughout her life have tried to control her, so she has devised an unbeatable method to escape from any confinement. Expected to act ladylike and serve the patriarchy, she has learned how to break free from these restraints and live her life as she deems fit. When she wants to have a little fun though, she does like to wear her Sweetheart Cuffs from the Kinky Peach, which never feel like they're truly holding her back.

 

The Maleficent Succubus Woman

A final ungodly being straight from the pits of hell, the Maleficent Succubus Woman resembles a mythical creature. She’s a devil in a new thong, and a crop tee that was custom tailored to fit her unique form. Born with two extra arms, she has all the more strength and agility, with the ability to perform unlike any woman you’ve met before. Her extra limbs and beautifully-made custom leather pieces from Occult Collection, an alternative leather shop, will make you want to stare. But don’t look for too long; her stone cold gaze will freeze you dead in your tracks.

 

 

 

 

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